The French are champions at dexterous sports such as fencing and skiing. But they really excel at their national pastime : parking. It's been elevated to an art form. We would be sure to win Gold, Silver and Bronze should parking ever become an Olympic sport. Parking garages and legal spots are for softies. The French find spots between cars, behind lampposts, and under busses that cause the Anglos ("but you can't possibly park there") to squeamishly shudder. Granted, you sometimes need a can opener to get out of your car. But the thrill of finding and easing your car into a space that only you have spotted induces a smug pleasure comparable to tripling your air miles through no expense of your own.

The French are a touchy-feely nation, so it's no surprise that gentle nudges and slight shoves between cars whilst indulging in the art of parking are quite acceptable. It's advisable however, before engaging in such foreplay, to check whether the other drivers are present Ñ and if they are it's best to limit contact with their cars to a strict minimum.

There is no need to restrict yourself to places on your side of the street Ñ veering across oncoming traffic or train tracks to grab a space might cause a show of fingers, but hey, this is high-level sport. Ditto holding up traffic waiting for someone to leave Ñnote how they take ages to load the car and make at least one drawn-out call while determinedly avoiding eye contact.

Sometimes when one is out in a car and one sees an